“I question your commitment to the cause”
This is what my friend the Big Brain joked once when I admitted that it had been a while since I’d seen a movie. Years later, I now know what a true movie dry spell looks like.
I had a hard realization two weeks ago when I looked at the Oscar ballot. I had seen none of the films that were nominated in the big categories. In fact, I’d only seen two that were nominated for anything at all: Spider-Man 2 and Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban. They were good, entertaining movies, but still.
I used to consider myself a film buff. My husband G. Grod and I own two movie guides, the Videohound’s Golden Movie Retriever and the much better, though less comprehensive
Time Out Film Guide. Tellingly, it has been at least two years since we’ve replaced our copies. During the opening montages on Oscar night, I recognize most of the clips. For several years, I read the British film magazine Sight and Sound. I watch Ebert and Roeper At the Movies every week, even if I don’t go see the films they talk about. After our son was born, though, everything changed. We had the same three Netflix movies for three months. We finally returned them, unwatched, and cancelled that service.
I know what the issues are. My husband and I don’t have a baby sitter, and aren’t looking too hard for one while he’s unemployed. By the time we put our son Drake to sleep, we’re often so tired that it requires herculean effort to do anything more than collapse in front of our Tivo. We watch a lot of television, which doesn’t leave much room around the edges for movies. Too often we’re not in the mood for something dark, or that’s over two hours.
It’s time for this to change; I don’t like that I watch more television than I do movies. Step one is to watch less television. I’ve already cut out three hours a week: Simpsons, Scrubs, House and Joan of Arcadia. They stopped being worth my time. Step two is for my husband and I to trade childcare, so that one of us watches our toddler Drake while the other goes out to see a movie. I prefer to see movies with someone rather than by myself, but I’d rather see a movie by myself than not see it at all. Eventually, we will get a babysitter. But until then, there are still ways to see a movie. We just have to work a little harder at it than we have been for the last eighteen months. Movies (or, at least, good movies) are worth it, so we will.
My favorite top 100 movie list is ten years old, but I think it has aged well. Interestingly, I don’t think that this year’s Oscar winner for Best Movie, Million Dollar Baby, would make the list if it were compiled today. I thought MDB was good, but not great. Was there another movie, American or not, made last year that was great, and would be included in a top 100 list? I’m not sure, because I didn’t go to the movies last year. I plan not to be so ill-informed next year.
March 8th, 2005 at 10:07 pm
I feel your pain.
When Meg was about six months old, I left the house to see a movie on my own for the first time since… well, since college. (And it was Pirates of the Caribbean.) We are fortunate in that we have grandparents who babysit often, but even with that there are often so many other things that need to be done that movies fall by the wayside.
(I didn’t do much better than you at the Oscarwatching stakes, though — no Spider-Man 2, but I did see Kinsey and Finding Neverland, mostly through sheer dogged determination because I refused to miss them. Good “artsy” movies rarely stick around here long.)
March 8th, 2005 at 10:08 pm
Clarifying: I had been to movies since college, but not by myself. That’s what I get for not self-editing, eh?
March 9th, 2005 at 2:43 pm
Pirates of the Caribbean was fun, wasn’t it? Not great, but well worth it for Depp’s performance alone.
It’s interesting to me that things I used to take for granted–movies, exercise, time to just think–have been so easy to let slide since Drake came into our lives. I have sometimes unfairly resented him for this. More recently, I am grateful. Limited time encourages fierce prioritization, which in turn leads to a life more full with better things, one of which is absolutely little Drake.
March 9th, 2005 at 10:49 pm
Pirates was a good ride and wasn’t stupid, and was exactly what I needed at that point. And Depp is marvelous. I know they’re making the two sequels now, and I can only hope they’ll be as enjoyable.
I think it’s something all mothers — all parents, really — go through: that realization that we aren’t free any more. That process where the unnecessary gets weeded out (or, at the very least, put on a “I’ll get to you in ten years or so” pile) was so healthy, though. I gave up many things, but I gained many excellent things (most of which are embodied in my daughter) and regained, for example, the library. And the joy of children’s books. And writing time, because I made that my number one non-family priority.
March 10th, 2005 at 2:37 pm
Darice, I’m laughing because your comments mirror my life so closely. I’m also loving the children’s books (Drake picked up Pooh today. Yay! Yay!) and putting writing at the top of the to-do list. And the entry that I’ve had brewing in my head is about libraries!