Girl Detective

Greg Mortenson is fighting a personal war on terror that has an impact on all of us, and his weapon is not guns or bombs, but schools. What could be a better story than that?

–Parade editor-in-chief Lee Kravitz

#48 in my 2007 book challenge was Three Cups of Tea by Greg Mortenson and David Oliver Relin. I was not excited when a friend picked this for one of my book groups. It sounded dull and a bit sappy. Once I started to read, though, my grinch-y heart melted, and the book completely won me over. Mortenson’s story is extraordinary, and it shines through all of Relin’s overwritten prose and Penguin’s sloppy spelling and typography mistakes.

After a failed attempt to climb K2, Mortenson got lost in Pakistan, and wound up in the village of Korphe. When he learned that the children were schooling themselves outdoors in the harsh climate, he promised he’d build them a school. Not only did he keep his promise, but he discovered a calling that led him to build schools throughout Pakistan, and into war-torn Afghanistan. By educating children, particularly girls, he continues to build a legacy of peace and understanding that defies the roots of terrorism. The details of Mortenson’s adventures are astonishing, and his story provides interesting insight into America’s conflict in the east, and with the Taliban and Al-Quaeda.

Read this book. Buy it, or request it at your library. Choose it for your book group. It’s a rich, provocative narrative; the effects linger after the last page.

If you buy the book at their site, 7% goes to girls’ scholarship in Pakistan and Afghanistan.

On my recent trip to NYC with friends from high school, the moms were talking about Santa Claus and their kids, and their experiences. One friend asked if I was going to encourage my kids to believe in Santa. I hadn’t thought about it much. At 3yo last Christmas, Drake didn’t really “get” it. This year, though, he would.

I’m torn. I remember loving the idea of Santa as a kid, and being excited about Christmas night. I also remember getting suspicious because my dad had clearly filled out all the “from Santa” tags. And it was a big bummer for me to learn the truth by reading an article in my mom’s Women’s Day about whether or not, and how, to tell kids about Santa and the Tooth Fairy.

My first response to my friend was that I would do Santa. But as they other moms talked, it became clear that the Santa story was a slippery slope that required fib upon fib to maintain. It brought to mind a bumper sticker I notice every time I drive to the grocery, which is usually twice a week: “Don’t Lie to Kids.” Right now, I think I’m in the “if he doesn’t ask, I’m not going to say.” But I’m definitely leaning now to talking about Santa as a story, not a reality. Perhaps only because I’m not a talented liar.

A month into the new season, and here’s how things stand in our house:

Mondays: How I Met Your Mother and Heroes
Tuesdays: Bones, House and Reaper
Wednesdays: Life, and Dirty Sexy Money
Thursdays: 30 Rock and The Office

The 30-minute comedies aren’t consistently funny. The Office especially suffered from the hour-long gimmick. But all three have enough gems to make me laugh out loud several times, and that’s good enough for me.

There’s lots of non-love for the new season of Heroes. My trick is to fast forward through the story lines that irritate or bore me–Maya for the first few eps, then New Orleans for the last few. I am bothered by the fake Irish and New Orleans accents. Parkman is more of a Power Tool than ever. Wait, why am I watching, again? Oh, that’s right. I like HRG and Claire, I hope to see her new boyfriend turn out to be evil, Kristen Bell is the new naughty hot girl tracker for the company, and…well, we’ll see.

I can’t believe I was ready to drop Bones. It’s like the studio gave the writers unlimited Red Bull or something. The characters and the dialogue are often hilarious. I’m enjoying the twist of House’s new staff, and the reality-show vibe of it.

Reaper was irking me after a strong pilot by merely doing the same thing over and over. But a few reveals in the last two episodes–Sam getting his contract from the devil, and Sam’s dad behaving badly–bode well for the future plots and character development, as noted by the Onion AV Club.

Last night’s Life had some terrible lines and a lame mystery (why does this happen right after a recommend a show?), but the backstory of his history was good. I haven’t watched DS$ yet, so more on that later.

I’m thankful they’re done. Maureen Ryan of The Watcher is, too, and she captures why quite well.

We’re a few weeks into the fall 2007 television schedule. On Wednesdays, I’ve already dropped Bionic Woman; the writing was terrible and uneven, and the lead was miscast. Instead I’m watching Dirty Sexy Money and Life, the latter of which is perhaps my favorite new show of the season.

Charlie Crews (played by English actor Damian Lewis) was wrongly imprisoned for twelve years, during which time he got the crap beaten out of him and read a book on Zen. Exonerated by DNA evidence, he emerged richer, odder, and with an interesting desire to have his old police job back.

Crews wobbles between his Zen leanings and his understandable desires for revenge and to know what really happened. He’s a strong main character with a good supporting cast. This is reminiscent of House and Monk. I’m worried that it’s scheduled against the much more lauded DS$, yet it’s being re-run on USA, so check it out whenever you can; it’s worth it.

#47 in my 2007 book challenge was Elizabeth Swados’s My Depression: A Picture Book. With simple black line drawings and minimal texts, Swados sketches out her history of depression and anxiety, as well as her “little cloud” that grew into a “black hole”. She bravely admits how badly she behaves when she’s depressed, both towards herself and others. She also has amusing lists, such as things people have told her to try to get out of the depression on her own. In the end, though, a combination of medicine and therapy are what worked for her, and her story is of hope and self-acceptance. Her illustrations, reminiscent of Shel Silverstein’s, are deliberately messy, conveying the frazzled ugliness of depression, as well as the silly joy in well-being. I recommend this book for those who have gone through a depression, who are in a depression, or who have known someone who’s been depressed. That should pretty much cover us all, I think.

#46 in my 2007 book challenge was The Amber Spyglass, the final book of Philip Pullman’s “His Dark Materials” trilogy. The third book felt a bit bloated compared to the first two, and the action slowed in places. But Pullman’s skill at multiple-world building continued as a strength, and the details, of the land of the dead, especially, were very satisfying. The polar bears are back, as are the fascinating daemons, but they’re both given short shrift compared to angels and heaven. The adults switch allegiances so often I lost track–who’s good and who’s bad, now?

Pullman’s narrative became much more anti-religion, as he expounded on in an interview with Christopher Hitchens in Vanity Fair when TAS was published. Interestingly, though, the absence of religion created voids that Pullman filled in the narrative with very similar things. Religion was a giant mistake, and there was no creator. But Dust was sentient, and had “gifted” humanity with consciousness, so it was a common, creative, animating spirit. The character of Will symbolizes free will, yet so much of the story is driven by fate, related to Lyra by the alethiometer, the witches from prophecies, and Mary Malone by the I Ching. I think Pullman worked hard to have an atheistic fantasy, but the end result was an agnostic one, which is a much richer, more complex result, I thought.

I liked the series a lot; I didn’t love it. Lyra never felt fully realized to me, though Will did. Some aspects of Dust were overexplained, while others were given less time. For example, why did the Dust stop rushing out of the world only because of humans–why hadn’t it done that before with the mulefa? But I was engaged with it from beginning to end, I cared about the characters, though some of them didn’t ring completely true with me, and the plot drew me through. It was fun, it was mostly well-written, and it had some big ideas that are interesting to discuss. It was well worth my time, even if I didn’t connect so completely as to love it.

Is it just me, or?

Perma-wash: Items to be laundered that sit perpetually in the bottom of the laundry basket, since newer items pile so high on top. AKA LIFO (Last In, First Out) laundry management.

Perma-snot: The dark, hard crust that forms under a child’s nose during winter cold season. Unsightly, but not a breathing hindrance. Attempts at removal will be met with screams of anguish, flailing limbs, accusing glares, and dramatic prostrations.

Pre-school started last month. 4yo Drake got a fever, sleep troubles, and a bad cough week before last. 20mo Guppy had a fever followed by a lingering case of croup.

Virus season in Minnesota lasts from October to April. I think we’re in for a long, snotty winter.

I’m sure I can’t come up with a title about handbags that hasn’t been done before, and to death. I admit, though, I love bags. I just took several to the charity shop yesterday in order to make space for the two new ones I have for fall, one black, one brown. On my recent jaunt to NYC, my friend LA needed a new bag, so we shopped on Canal St. I advised her to buy a dark-olive suede one for fall, because the olive would be more interesting than black and brown, yet still go with almost everything. She rocked that bag for the rest of the weekend.

This piece on the handbag from The Smart Set (link from Arts & Letters Daily) didn’t tell me anything I didn’t know, but it was still fun to read. My current bag strategy is to get an idea from the fashion mags of what’s in, find a reasonable facsimile at Target on the clearance rack, use it for the season, then give it away. I did it this summer, and will try to stick to it this fall/winter, too.

Oh, I do rather miss the childish phrase, “No, duh!” I read a few things recently that brought it to mind.

1. Children need sleep.
2. Boy children shorten their mothers lives. (What? Only 34 weeks? I swear it feels like more than that already.) (Links from Arts and Letters Daily)

And, finally, one not-so-obvious thing that wasn’t at all surprising. I felt chagrined that I hadn’t intuited it between the lines:

3. Dumbledore was gay.

I am enchanted at how J.K. Rowling has the entire complicated backstory of her universe rattling around in her head. She could probably just do Q & A events for the rest of her life.

#72 in my 2007 movie challenge was Billy Wilder’s Ace in the Hole, supposedly a lost classic resurrected by the Criterion Collection. I can easily see why the movie bombed when it came out. It has Wilder’s hallmarks of dark humor and sarcasm, but in the end it’s too bitter. Kirk Douglas is a sleazy reporter who thinks he’s found his ticket out of small-town exile when he comes across a human interest story about a trapped treasure hunter. He and the other characters are almost beyond redemption, and their manipulation is queasy to watch. Smart and sharp, but too heartless for me to enjoy.

Recently released by the Criterion Collection, #71 in my 2007 movie challenge was David Mamet’s directorial debut, House of Games. Joe Mantegna is arresting in his first starring role, and it’s easy to see why Lindsay Crouse’s character was drawn to him. (Crouse was married to Mamet at the time. I am more familiar with her as the psych. prof. from Buffy the Vampire Slayer.) Crouse is a therapist with a patient who says he owes thousands of dollars. Crouse promises to try to help him, and gets drawn to a group of grifters. It’s a twisty, noir movie that turns some of the conventions upside down. Crouse is more the innocent bystander than the femme fatale. That role is filled more by Mantegna. The end is also not typical of noir; Crouse is not crushed by either the city or by crime. The transfer on the Criterion print is lovely. Crouse’s hair and wardrobe, though, are laughably typical of the 80’s, reminding me of Patrick Nagel prints and shoulder-padded power suits.

#70 in my 2007 movie challenge was Baz Luhrmann’s first film, Strictly Ballroom. Does it seem possible that this is fifteen years old? This movie is a favorite of my husband G. Grod’s and mine. A young ballroom dancer wants to use his own steps. The mousy girl teams up with him, and has a few moves of her own. Like Luhrmann’s other films, the story is no surprise, nor is its ending. It’s a combination of the Cinderella and Young Hero myths. Yet like his other films, its the spectacle that entrances me–the over-the-top characters and costumes, and the brazen musical dance numbers. I like that the girl is believably mousy; she’s not just a model with a pair of glasses and mussed hair. SB is loud, colorful, fun, sweet, and just the thing after a long day.

#69 in my 2007 movie challenge was Pedro Almodovar’s Volver. It’s a dark, funny meditation on the support that women give and get when times get tough. Penelope Cruz is lovely, tough, and vulnerable as Raimunda, and is far better than in any American film I’ve seen. Throughout, there is heightened style, deliberate use of color, and steady tension that gave homage to Hitchcock. The look, coupled with Almodovar’s sympathetic female characters, and bittersweet drama, made this one of my favorite recent films.

#68 in my 2007 movie challenge was Wild Strawberries, part of a retrospective at the Oak Street Cinema to honor the late Ingmar Bergman (no relation to the actress Ingrid Bergman.) It’s a beautiful black and white film. The main character is an elderly doctor who has to travel to another city to receive an honor for his career. He chooses to drive with his daughter-in-law. Along the way, he has meaningful dreams, poignant reminiscences, and frank conversations. They pick up a group of young hitchhikers and a bickering couple who’ve been in a car accident. There’s no shortage of themes to ponder, in spite of the film’s 91-minute running time–parenthood, aging, marriage, career, and happiness are but a few. I feel fortunate I was able to see this in a theater. I found it a film that was lovely to look at, and engaging to think about.

#45 in my 2007 book challenge was The Subtle Knife by Philip Pullman, the sequel to The Golden Compass. It is a characteristic second book in a trilogy. The beloved and hated characters are back, the plot speeds along, but the end is more cliffhanging than that of the first book. I am glad to be reading this trilogy when I can immediately pick up book 3, since there was a long time between the publishing of the last two books.

TSK shares many strengths with TGC: nefarious villains, engaging child protagonists, religion, adventure, and the utterly engaging daemons, familiars who take animal form and accompany their human partners in the world of heroine Lyra. But it also shares the shortcomings. The adults are either entirely good, or entirely evil. Religion is completely messed up. And all parents are, in some way, bad parents; the only good adults are non parents. The children are wise and well spoken beyond their years. As the book progressed, I became increasingly irritated by the construct of the alethiometer, the device the first book was named after. Since it’s all knowing and Lyra can magically read it exactly and perfectly, then there is little that’s left to chance for the children. They know far too much about what’s happening and what’s going to happen for there to be a believable and constant tension. Finally, I thought there were far too few armored polar bears in this book compared to its predecessor.

I feel bad criticizing this book; I know so many friends who love the series, and they are friends whose taste I admire and respect. I raced through the book, and enjoyed it. But I was also nagged by little things as I sped along that left me feeling unsatisfied by the end.

#67 in my 2007 movie challenge was the sleeper Irish musical, Once. This is a charming, engaging film that never strays over the line into twee. It also doesn’t have the formula of many English/Irish films for American audiences: charming loser/underdog (who usually recruits friends to help) makes good. See, for example, Brassed Off, Waking Ned Devine, Billy Elliott, The Full Monty, that one about the guy swimming the channel, that one with Anthony Hopkins on a motorcycle, etc.

Glen Hansard is a street musician who catches the attention of Marketa Irglova, a Czech immigrant, who is also a musician. They have a good time, make music, then have an authentic ending. The music is great; I admired it all the more when I found out that Hansard and Irglova were performing their own compositions. This was a beautiful, tender, decidedly non-flashy musical, if such a thing isn’t an oxymoron. Loved it.

I went to New York City for a long weekend with seven of my high school girlfriends. We had a great tour guide in E, who lives there. We did lots of tourist-y stuff, like the top of Rockefeller Center, an open-top bus tour, Ground Zero, a show, shopping on Canal Street, walking Central Park, and crossing the Brooklyn Bridge at night. I’m not sure we ever stopped talking, and that made something of a spectacle on the subway. (”But we’re the only ones who know each other!” protested our friend P.) We were wives, mothers, singles, professional and stay-at-home. Only three of us live in our home state, now.We are all different, but somehow all the same, too. It was a good weekend.

Some things I was reminded of about NYC: Watch where you step; lots of people have dogs. Restaurants are LOUD. Food is plentiful and varied. Red tour buses are a lot more prevalent than blue ones. Even the coffee lingo is different: a red-eye is a cup of coffee with a shot of espresso–here in MN we call it a depth charge. And in NYC, you can get two shots, which is (of course) a black eye.

I’m sure there’s more, but I can’t recall. There was burn on re-entry, as usual. Guppy refused to kiss me, hug me or let me hold him for several hours. Drake seemed excited to see me, but he’d been sick all weekend, so his listening skills are even sketchier than usual. G. Grod has his hands full over the weekend so I could get time away. I’m very grateful, both to him for the break, and because I have a group of good friends so many years after high school, and that we all made the time and effort for the trip.

Don’t want to check bags? No problem, as long as you’re familiar with the most recent Transportation Security Administration guidelines, updated last year to restrict liquids and gels. Interestingly, though, they are now more lenient with grooming tools such as nail clippers and tweezers.

To sum up, passengers are usually allowed two carryons–a small suitcase and a personal bag. Liquids or gels in carry-on bags going through security must be in 3-oz or smaller containers, and all fit in a quart size zip-top plastic bag. This can be tricky if you’re not checking a bag, and going somewhere longer than overnight. Here’s an ample sample plan, with examples from brands that carry travel sizes:
Toothpaste

Shampoo

Conditioner

Hair product

Face lotion w/ SPF

Night Cream

Body lotion

Eye drops

Deodorant

Hand sanitizer

Mascara

Evian mist

Cortisone cream

Other items for the kit that don’t need to be plastic-bagged:

hairbrush
comb
toothbrush
floss
disposable razor (use it and lose it!)
eyelash curler
lipstick
lip balm
blush
eye pencil
bandages for blisters
tweezers
prescription meds (keep in original bottles for unexpected refills)
decongestant and ibuprofen
multivitamin
hairband
powder
hair elastics

And one of my all-time favorite, most useful products

Dove Sensitive Skin bar

OK, I’m off to test my theory….After about 30 minutes, I’ve got all the stuff from the first list fitting comfortably in a quart bag, and the rest of the stuff in a gallon bag. I tweaked the lists a bit, and I think this should leave me prepared, not weighed down, and get me through security.